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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25191871">Tear Up Your Lungs For The Sake Of Rejection</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/luckinagi/pseuds/luckinagi'>luckinagi</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dangan Ronpa 3: The End of 希望ヶ峰学園 | The End of Kibougamine Gakuen | End of Hope's Peak High School</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Hanahaki Disease, How Do I Tag, I truly am, I'm so sorry, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 08:46:58</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,563</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25191871</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/luckinagi/pseuds/luckinagi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Hanahaki Disease- A disease contracted from one-sided love. It can be cured with the feelings being returned, or removing the flowers and taking the feelings with them.</p><p>Of course, you can always die with your feelings, as well.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kamukura Izuru/Komaeda Nagito</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>123</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Tear Up Your Lungs For The Sake Of Rejection</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I apologize in advance.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Komaeda can't breathe. It's near impossible. He's suffocating, and something's lodged in his throat. </p><p>He tries sticking his fingers down his throat, and he ends up violently coughing. It hurts to cough and there's petals in his mouth. </p><p>The petals are coughed into his hand, covered with blood. Komaeda nearly gags.</p><p>"Heh... Just my luck. Hanahaki disease." </p><p>He takes the petals to the bathroom to wash them. It's no good trying to figure out what they mean if they're covered in blood.</p><p> </p><p>It doesn't take Komaeda much searching to finally come to his answer.</p><p>The petals consists of four flowers. Eustomas, dark red roses, red roses, and violets.</p><p>Eustomas and violets are easy. Gratitude and loyalty.</p><p>Komaeda already knows who this person is. The meanings of the flowers just confirmed it more.</p><p>The roses are slightly more difficult to find meanings for. Though, he eventually settles for desire and love.</p><p>It's a shame he'll have to get Tsumiki to remove the disease.</p><p>Or, maybe he'll die with it.</p><p>But if he dies, that's an inconvenience to Kamukura. </p><p>What is he thinking? Kamukura won't care about him dying. </p><p>Confessing isn't an option. Kamukura doesn't feel, and there's no way Komaeda was going to tie him down to someone unworthy, such as himself. </p><p>There's a pang of hurt in his chest. Is it the roots of the flowers or is the fact Kamukura will never return the feelings finally settling in?</p><p>Komaeda's stupid. Who catches feelings for someone who, no matter what, won't return them? He's so stupid it hurts. This was how he was going to die. He was going to succumb to the flowers before he would even think about confessing.</p><p>Waiting to confess saves him embarassment, anyways . Saves him time. And most certainly, saves Kamukura from having to explain that he doesn't like Komaeda like that because, honestly, who would? Who would willingly like someone like him, who follows who he can anywhere and everywhere?</p><p>"Aha... I'm pathetic."</p><p>Komaeda stands against a wall and slides down until he's sitting. Knees pulled to his chest, arms wrapped around them like his life depended on it.</p><p>Kamukura won't be back until later. He can just burn the petals. There's no evidence if he burns them.</p><p>So that's what he does.</p><p> </p><p>There's an open field behind the hotel they're staying at. All Komaeda has to do is set fire to them, watch them burn, and put the fire out.</p><p>Thanks to Lady Luck, there's a clearing.</p><p>The petals burn there, and he stomps the fire out. It's as if nothing happened.</p><p>He's disobeyed orders to stay inside, but what Kamukura doesn't know won't hurt him. If he's asked, he'll just say he went outside to clear his mind and fresh air. It's not entirely false.</p><p> </p><p>Kamukura returns late that night, about three A.M. if Komaeda has to guess. He wakes up in alert, and settles when he realizes it's just Kamukura.</p><p>"Welcome back," Komaeda mumbles, rubbing sleep from his eyes, "Did you enjoy your trip with Enoshima and Ikusaba..?"</p><p>"It was uneventful. Gambling, strippers, the like. I should have convinced Enoshima to let me bring you along. Your luck would have done wonderful things in Vegas," Kamukura replies easily, already taking off the suit jacket and tie. </p><p>"Oh, no. I understand. I was fine right here." The fact that Kamukura even thought about him once is enough to make his heart flutter and chest ache.</p><p>"So I trust that you ate?"</p><p>"Ah, I had breakfast."</p><p>"Which was?"</p><p>"A... granola bar? I don't remember."</p><p>Kamukura sighs as he changes from suit pants to sweatpants, "I leave you alone while I'm away, and you can barely take care of yourself."</p><p>"I remembered my medications, though. So, not completely barely." The blankets around him are soft enough to attempt to lull him back to sleep, but Kamukura just got back and he's determined to spend nearly all the time he has with Kamukura. Even if he's slowly killing Komaeda.</p><p>"You're tired."</p><p>"Just slightly."</p><p>"You just woke up. Go back to sleep."</p><p>"But..."</p><p>Kamukura sighs, pulling on a plain white t-shirt and... since when did he take his shirt off? Oh no. Was Komaeda staring? "But nothing. I'm not going anywhere. I'm going to bed."</p><p>"Should I move, then? I mean, there's only one bed and you've been up for nearly twenty-four hours. I'd hate to keep you awake when you need sleep."</p><p>"It's fine. Go back to sleep." </p><p>Komaeda shifts so he's closer to the wall, ane Kamukura slips in next to him. It's best if Komaeda keeps his distance, so he does.</p><p>They've shared a bed before. Enoshima likes picking the hotel rooms, and they're the ones who end up with the single bed rooms. Komaeda thinks she's doing it on purpose, and Kamukura knows she does it on purpose. </p><p>"...Kamukura?"</p><p>"Yes?"</p><p>"You don't... hate me, right?"</p><p>Kamukura turns on his side to look at Komaeda. "No. I don't... hate anyone. Why?"</p><p>"If I died due to a stupid reason... Say, a disease... That I didn't tell you about, would you hate me then?"</p><p>"Komaeda. You know nothing gets around me. Either tell me now, or I will eventually find out."</p><p>"I can't tell you now. It's useless to tell you. You can't fix it." It can be fixed, though, and even by Kamukura if he so wished.</p><p>"It's not useless if I can at least attempt."</p><p>"You can't. I... I like this person too much and I don't want to get rid of my feelings for them. Heh, it's gross. I'd rather die for them than get rid of my feelings."</p><p>"Ah. I see."</p><p>Kamukura doesn't exactly understand. Komaeda should live, he shouldn't have to die with unreturned feelings.</p><p>"What do I even do, Kamukura? I'm sure this person would never like me back. I'm not their type..."</p><p>"You deserve more than what you think," Kamukura says, turning onto his back and staring at the ceiling. "They'd be wrong to not accept your confession."</p><p>"And if they don't accept?"</p><p>"They clearly have no taste. You're aesthetically pleasing. Sure, your personality has ups and downs, but it's what makes you, yourself."</p><p>Here Komaeda goes again with overthinking. Surely, Kamukura doesn't like him back. If he did, the pain in his lungs wouldn't be there. It ached and hurt. </p><p>"Oh."</p><p>"Oh?"</p><p>"I'm sorry for keeping you awake longer." Komaeda turned over, facing the wall. "Goodnight, Kamukura..."</p><p>"I... Alright. Goodnight."</p><p> </p><p>For months on, Komaeda is able to keep the disease hidden from Kamukura. At least, he thinks he's able to.</p><p>It's just getting worse. It hurts to breathe at this point, and it's getting more and more difficult to hide.</p><p>He's going to die soon. He knows it. There's good things that are going to come out of his death. He just knows there has to be. </p><p>Hope always sprouts from the roots of despair, doesn't it? Though, his death may not be despairful for others.</p><p>Komaeda wonders, does Kamukura know by now? Is he just going to let Komaeda suffer and die? Honestly, Komaeda wouldn't blame him if he did. He's annoying, acts like a lost puppy. There's no reasons as to why Kamukura would want him around.</p><p>In a way, it hurts. It hurts him so much. Knowing there's no possibility he'll survive this. Dying knowing you were full of love rather than surviving by removing those feelings seemed like a better option, anyways. It was either die altogether, or let your feelings die. Confessing was never an option.</p><p> </p><p>"Goodnight, Kamukura! I hope you sleep well!" </p><p>They have their own rooms this time, sort of. Their rooms are connected.</p><p>"Mhm. Sleep well."</p><p>It's different, not crawling into bed with Kamukura when they go to bed. Komaeda's able to manage, though, shutting the door to his room and nestling into the blankets. </p><p>And for the first time in a few days, he falls asleep near immediately.</p><p> </p><p>And then he's brought out of his sleep. </p><p>Komaeda jerks awake in a sweat, barely registering that Kamukura is next to him before he's bolting out of his room and to the bathroom. </p><p>There's not enough time to make it to the toilet, so he settles for the sink, having half of a mind to shut and lock the door before he starts retching. The flowers flush themselves from his lungs and... why?</p><p>Why is this happening? Why are they coming up on their own? They're full flowers, stems, thorns and all, and Komaeda can feel his throat being torn as he coughs them up. Blood naturally follows with them, and it's all pouring from his mouth.</p><p>He just can't get it to stop, crying tears of frustration. He was supposed to die with these feelings. He isn't dead, so if this doesn't kill him, he doesn't know what will.</p><p>Komaeda's vision goes blurry, and then dark. Then, he's hitting the floor.</p><p> </p><p>When he wakes up, Kamukura is there.</p><p>"Don't speak. It will hurt. You tore your throat up, though, I'm assuming you already knew that."</p><p>Komaeda then whines, if he can't speak, he can't explain.</p><p>"Hush. There's no need for whining." Kamukura lays down next to Komaeda, pulling him close for comfort. "The worst of it is over. You can go back to sleep now."</p><p>Komaeda weakly smiles, and falls right back to sleep.</p><p>This time, he doesn't wake up.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Aha. Ahahaha.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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